The Desperate Housewife

Desperately BORED, that is. Now I completely understand why housewives get into all types of mischief,  like the ever popular sordid love affair with the surprisingly-muscular-for-his-age pool boy. It’s the afternoon boredom! My mornings are great – they bustle with energy and productivity; with my new routine I wake up early (let’s just agree that 8:30 a.m. qualifies as early) and clean or launder, then maybe go to the gym, check my emails/Facebook, read a book and before I know it, it’s time for lunch!

But eventually and rather unfortunately, lunchtime has to end at one point or another. I then spend the afternoon in absolute tedium, traipsing interchangeably from the reading chair to the computer to the fridge. My unholy trinity. Two weeks ago I would have been content to watch TV the entire afternoon without the slightest bit of shame. But now I’ve gone and convinced myself that TV is the root of all evil (see footnote) and my nemesis in the journey towards better housewifery. So where does that leave me? Bored out of my freaking mind and ready to fling myself off the balcony at any given moment. Some of you working folk might be seething with anger as you read this, wondering how I have the audacity to complain about my afternoons while you’re stuck doing mind-numbing, life-draining excel spreadsheets in a dreary cubicle.  But before you start foaming at the mouth, please remember that you get paid for the boring crap you do. Me? Not so much.

I could blog more often but it would probably be best to spare you from too many mindless rants within the same week. The pool attendants at our communal pool are all middle aged and female which takes one possibility off the table (husband, you can breathe a sigh of relief). So, as much as it pains me to say this because it makes me feel at least 100 years old, I may need to explore the age old housewife tradition of  crafting. The world may not need any more hand-made soap, candles or jewelry but world be dammed, I need something to do!

It’s decided then. Crafting will henceforth be adopted as a suitable afternoon pastime. I intend to keep you abreast of any developments (or lack thereof) in my newly found pursuit so stay tuned for updates on this topic. 

*Footnote: This only applies to the hours before 6 p.m. I happily and unabashedly follow pretty much every primetime show that exists.    

PS – My mind, body & soul makeover is going well if you were by any chance wondering. I have a healthy stash of books waiting to be read and have already ordered my meditation CD.  As fate would have it though, my cheap ass forgot that I purchased a gym membership that only allows me to use the gym 3 days/week so unfortunately my 5 day plan had to trim down to 3. Okay, who am I kidding, the realization that I couldn’t go to the gym more than 3 times/week even though I wanted to was the best thing that happened to me all week, possibly even all month.

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9 Comments

  1. Shecago said,

    August 16, 2010 at 5:27 pm

    Have you thought at all about volunteering? I’m currently looking into volunteer opportunities so that when my job ends (in 2.5 weeks!!!) I won’t go out of my mind with boredom, or get depressed from lack of personal contact (my bigger worry).

    • August 17, 2010 at 10:07 am

      Admittedly, I’ve not explored the volunteering option enough…I think I’m too picky because I want it to be something I enjoy, PLUS I don’t want to end up spending (too much) money on transport. I admire you A LOT for looking into such opportunities before your job has even ended! What an inspiration for my lazy behind…I will definitely look into it again as well.

  2. wambui said,

    August 17, 2010 at 4:53 am

    Take it easy on the gym, remember you are pregnant if there is ever a time when you can ignore the gym now would be the time. So whats my excuse???
    On crafting, what better time or excuse to start knitting that baby blanket or sweater? How about some cross-stitch wall hanging for the little girls room? Then the next time you are asked what you do, you will have a list of all these creative things to say that you are doing, followed by some tips on meditation and some more info from your books. Oh how I wish I was in your shoes, dear sister enjoy this time of your life, you will one day wish you did.

    • August 17, 2010 at 10:14 am

      Hi Wambui! Reading your comment made me quite excited about all the things I can make for the little one! To be sure, I have never knitted anything but scarves in my life, but with all this time on my hands, I’m sure I can learn to do other things! I think I’ll start with a baby blanket. Thanks for reminding me to enjoy this time of my life…at 3:30 p.m. when I’m all alone and bored at home, I need to remember these words!

  3. Dutta said,

    August 20, 2010 at 8:40 am

    This is the one time you can indulge in all you want, you are pregnant, work out just so you say you did stretch your muscles aha. girls the gym will be your best friend after the baby comes. I’m so excited for you. So take it easy.

    Ok I was about to suggest the same thing, crafting as a pastime. Infact if you so enjoy it so much it you can sell your creations oo ooo ooo maybe make gift baskets for friends.

    • August 20, 2010 at 11:26 am

      Yes! After this baby comes I will be on a major ‘get back in shape’ kick and I expect all of you to be my cheeleaders! In fact I will post my weight loss progress (or lack thereof) for all to see every week. I just ordered my knitting wool supplies so I can’t wait to get started on my crafts :-). Thanks for the luv & support hun!

  4. Amanda said,

    August 23, 2010 at 8:55 am

    I love this! Love the writing, love the humor. I feel inspired to accept the life of housewifery…might have to convince the man first.
    Glad you posted a link on facebook. Now I can blog-stalk you too. 😉

    • August 23, 2010 at 11:09 am

      Hi Amanda! You can blog-stalk me anytime! Don’t worry, the men come around once they see how happy we are (not to mention how clean the house looks)!

  5. October 25, 2010 at 11:39 am

    […] when I said that my afternoons were utterly boring and that I was going to take up some sort of crafting […]


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